How Do I Start?

I am not a writter, although I write--if you can call it that. I haven't mastered any forms of communication, as my son Michael often brings to point. Like millions out there, I think I can write that award winning novel and be whisked away to fame and fortune---but alas, the reality hits me and quickly snaps me back to the fact that I struggle with the basic of English grammar. I love words; yet find it hard to find that perfect adjective to put my readers in my head; I tend to bore or confuse them. I remember watching a stage play on Sundance channel about a woman who was dying, her words flowed effortlessly and hypontized me. How I wished I could be able to tell the world my thoughts and give it such meaning. I think I read the actress died from a terrible mishap. On the other-hand, I read a blog of a college student who was a self-proclaimed poet living in France, and I found it almost comical how he tried to make poetic words fit into meanless spaces. I felt his writting more suited of a teaser for the local newscast
 "....This just in...Prolic township reeks of the desperate nocturnal effrontery..more at eleven.".(and cue music).  See there I go-- can't even spell or put collective thoughts together but I can be a harsh critic to others that can. So without further delay .......
Here is my disclaimer:
 I am NOT
 aways nice, a good writer, a good mother, a good wife, a good housekeeper, a good cook, a healthy person, a healthy eater, a good investor, a spiritual person, a good lover, a good friend, an educated person, a frugal shopper, a friend to the enviroment, a polical genius, a good speller, a good editor, or anything else
BUT
At times---I think I am....in my own world... but reality brings me back to humility that I yearn to escape.
Don't worry I dont believe I am crazy, although crazy people can't see themselves as such so the verdict is purely yours. I just want a place where I can speak my mind---and maybe some day get feedback.  That is if my fragile ego can handle it. I will write, not well, but I will write---not sure how much I will write-- after all follow-through is one of my biggest weaknesses. Most of my blogs will be raw and unedited--I am not even sure readers could understand my garbled mess or even want to try to understand. So for now this will be my secret---shhhhhhhhhh...